What is a coach and why do I need one?
For most of our lives, the only coaches we knew of where sports coaches. In the past couple of decades the coaching industry has exploded. More and more people are starting to recognize the importance and value of having a coach, be it a health coach, life coach or any other coach. The benefits and growth development most people experience through coaching are sometimes greater than psychotherapy or therapy. It may sound strange at first, but the methodology behind it is the key as to why the coaching industry is so successful. In coaching the focus in FORWARD, while is therapy the focus is on the past.
Some people do evolve and gain a lot from therapy and delving into the why and how they got to where they are today, and for some it’s an absolute must especially if they are dealing with a mental disorder, abuse and childhood issues. However some people actually get stuck in the past and can’t propel themselves forward. Coaching however focuses on moving FORWARD and is designed around a strategic game plan to help people succeed on their path of choice.
Divorce is hard!
It brings out the worst in people. You might have heard the saying, “In criminal law, you have bad people at their best, but in a divorce, you have good people at their worst.” It’s so true. That is when divorce coaching comes into play and why I am so passionate about helping people through this journey.
Why hire a divorce coach: How will a divorce coach help me?
Sometimes you feel like it is the only way forward, other times you worry that this could be your only chance of happiness. As a woman you may feel that your biological clock is ticking and if you leave you may never have the chance to have kids. Maybe your relationship has fizzled out and you feel there is more to life. You are unsure of what the divorce process entails and what it would mean to if you chose to walk away from your marriage.
I can’t emphasize enough the need to have a solid support network during a divorce. Family and friends are important, but they can only give you part of what you need. They are naturally biased…because they are your family and friends. As a divorce coach, while I am on your team and your advocate, I am not here to support you with all “yes’s” to collateral disaster. I am here to help you keep your eye on the prize, stay out of trouble and give you professional guidance and clarity.
You may be in a state of shock or overwhelm. You are scared of what the future holds and how you will cope without your ex. You are frightened of what lies ahead and need some help to process what has happened and how to move forward with the divorce process. The devastation has left you crushed and filled with questions why this happened to you?
High conflict divorces can be very draining. You may be struggling to deal with an aggressive and bullying ex. You may be feeling you don’t have the strength to see your divorce through as it is causing you so much stress it may be impacting your parenting, career as well as your emotional wellbeing.
Maybe you have been in a long relationship and have lost your sense of self. You can’t see a future without your ex and or how it is possible to ever be happy again. Having been there I can support you and help you see a new and better future for yourself.
It can be hard to be emotionally strong enough to support your kids through what is a life changing event in their lives, especially when you are struggling to deal with the break up yourself. You need support, strategies and techniques on how to juggle your emotional stress with their needs successfully.
Unlike family and friends, as a divorce coach I will help you develop a plan for each stage of the process. As a coach I am here to provide you with guidance for the emotional decisions and how to respond to difficult spouses, situations and challenges that come along the way. What you need is someone who understands what you are going through as they have been through a divorce themselves and can offer you a tool kit of advice and strategies that will get you where you need to be.
You keep asking yourself why this happened to you and what you did wrong to deserve this. You had everything invested in a relationship that betrayed you. You never saw the red flags and even when you did you tried to pretend that things are fine, hoping that someday they will be. Divorce takes a huge toll on most women and most of the time impacts their self-esteem as well as their self-image. Your confidence may be so low that it is keeping you home in order to avoid having to face people and explaining to everyone that you are now going through a divorce.
You may or may not hire an attorney to help you file your divorce, but regardless attorneys are a lot pricier then coaches. A minimum retainer will be $5000 and up, and it will never cover your divorce process. In addition, attorneys charge by the hour, every time you call them the timer is on, every time you email them that timer is ticking. There are so many reasons clients reach out to attorneys for not realizing that they are being charged a hefty price for it. As a divorce coach I am trained to answer a lot of the questions and help you get organized for the court process. Last but not least getting you prepared for the court proceeding will end up saving you a bundle that you can put towards treating yourself on a nice relaxing and much needed vacation.
Do you really want to represent yourself without an attorney or a divorce coach? You might not think you need one, but most people get overwhelmed when it comes to the law and going to court. I don’t blame them, it’s overwhelming! Yes, a coach costs money, but so do most things in life. Nobody wants to get divorced, but if you have to go through the process, go through it with a proper support network so you come out the other side prepared to succeed and move on.
You have grieved your relationship and are ready to move forward but are stuck as you have lost your identity as a single person. You have been co-dependent for so long on your ex that you are unclear on what you really want and where you want to go. You need to plan out your future and get a clear action plan of what you want and how to get it.
You are fed up of being single and are yearning for a meaningful relationship. You are dreaming of moving on to a new chapter and rebuilding your life. You feel you have gotten over your ex and clear about who you are and what path you want to take. Yet you are stuck and afraid of having to go back into the dating scene again, and have no clue how to go about it. After all its been a long time since your last date ! Getting guidance and dating advice from a former divorce mom who was single for many years, will save you a lot of unnecessary pain and hopefully help you find and connect to people with real potential for a happy future.
What can a coach help me with?